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UNDAUNTED
For a few very hard years this word was my mantra.
The word means
-undismayed; not discouraged; not forced to abandon purpose or effort
-undiminished in courage or valor; not giving way to fear
But the truth is, I was often dismayed by everything that had taken place, and I did battle discouragement. I battled fear and doubts. I hurt and was angry, and sometimes "undaunted" sounded more like a mockery than a mantra, and I was determined to be real about all of it in these posts, thus the name, Undaunted Reality. More than that, though, I was determined to live undaunted, not because I'm so great or strong, but because my God is, and no matter what this world looks like, He is the only reality that matters.
I pray I live the reality of Him beautifully undaunted.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Knowing

I grew up in church, there every time the doors were open, even when we were sick and there was no heater. I memorized verses. Sang hymns. Prayed at the old wooden altar, knees on the hard wood floors. I don't remember ever doubting there is a God, and I thought I knew God.

But the God I've seen in the last year is unlike anything I've ever known or experienced before.

I have been in awe of His power. I have been overwhelmed by His greatness.

Now I am undone by His gentleness.

I have never experienced such compassion or kindness in my whole life. It is as though He has stepped from His high throne as King and wrapped Himself in a towel...and I never understood. I am sure I don't understand now...but for the first time, I am beginning to know that He really does...

And while I am left thinking I do not know this God who is so patient in simply being with me...for me...I am mystified by the completeness of His knowing me.

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