Believing

Today I am thinking a lot about Abraham, how the Lord told him to move, so he picked it all up and moved. And I wonder if the voice God used for Abraham is louder than the voice He uses for me. Did Abraham ever wonder if he had heard correctly? Did he ever have those moments when he thought this had to the absolute stupidest thing he'd ever done? 

Except following God is never stupid.

Sometimes it is hard, but it never stupid.

I keep telling myself this as I walk to the front of my yard and plant the for sale sign near the street. I tell myself this as I look around at all the things that aren't "perfectly" clean or perfectly staged and wonder how in the world I'll ever get all of it done, and if I don't, what?

Does it not sell? What then?

What if it does?

Unlike Abraham, I have no clear vision for where I am going or what I'm supposed to do, and sometimes that leaves me wanting to go back to bed and pull the covers over my head and indulge in the idea I really heard nothing. Surely Abraham never felt that way.

Or may he did.

I don't know.

I know he believed God and it was credited to him as righteousness.

Today I am looking at the promises that have not come to pass and the changes that are happening again, and I am asking if I believe God. And if so, what do I believe?

I believe God is good. Even when the road is hard...sometimes the road is hard because God is good.
I believe when God says He is my strength, He knows humans are a muddy lot and mud's fortitude can be eroded with hard weather, and sometimes, I'm incredibly muddy.
I believe He keeps His promises.
I believe He is good. I know. I already said that, but sometimes that is all I know to believe when once again I simply don't understand the road I am on and I don't understand His choices and like Abraham, all the good stuff doesn't feel so good when the desires of my heart seem so unimportant.

And sometimes that is how it feels.

And, yes, Abraham felt the same way. He even told God as much. God promised him land and wealth and renown, and Abraham responded with, "What does it matter if I have no son?" Then God, instead of reprimanding Abraham for his ungrateful attitude, said, "I know your heart, Abraham. I know what you really want. I'm gong to give you that, too."

Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness.

Abraham believed God, so when God said it was time to move, Abraham moved. Abraham didn't know exactly how God was going to do what He promised, but he knew the moving created the atmosphere where the fulfillment could happen.

In a lot of ways, I feel lost, not knowing exactly what I'm supposed to be moving toward. I wonder if Abraham ever felt that way. I wonder if he ever sat alone, breathed deep, and whispered quiet:

God is good.
He keeps His promises.
His strength is enough when mine isn't.
God is good.
This I believe.

God looked at Abraham's belief and credited it to him as righteousness. God was good to Abraham. And He did keep His promises.

This same God is still good...and still keeps His promises.

And following Him is never stupid.

This I believe.

So...I am following His voice and moving on.


Copyright 2015 Jerri Kelley Phillips