2013 kicked my butt royally. When I look back, I just think, "God, that was a hard year." And it was. It was also a year of transition. WonderGirl decided she was done with Teenpact. We moved. Relationships changed radically. Archery, firearms training, and kayaking were all lost in the changes. My beautiful truck that I enjoyed so much was totaled. IT WAS HARD.
But we got the sunrise. Every morning. Just over there.
Every time I would sit in front of the Lord and wonder what in the world he was doing and why in the world he would put us here, I would make myself watch the sunrise. Where we lived before here, we never saw the sunrise. It was too full of trees and houses and highline poles. Here, I sit, drink my coffee, rock on my patio, and watch the sky explode into a sunrise. MY LANDS. I always see it as His personal gift to me. Something we share, like the whisperings between lovers...spoken as loud as the sky.
I wish I had some fabulous metaphor about the sunrise and 2014, but the truth is I realize 2014 may be another hard year. I have things I hope to accomplish and hope to receive. I have things I would like to see happen and ways I want life to change, and I know good things will come.
But I also realize I may spend a lot of it on my knees like I did this one. I realize what I am hoping for may not happen in those 365 days. I realize changes are inevitable, and some are going to be hard.
I also realize God is good, and whatever comes there will be something He gives me that I can hold onto. Something is going to break the darkness and shine, and when I'm in tears and broken, I will stop and make myself look at that and realize I am not forgotten. I am not abandoned. I am loved. He has a purpose. He is whispering. We are still lovers, and His heart is still for me. Big as the sky.
2014, I'm ready for you.
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