For a few very hard years this word was my mantra.
The word means
-undismayed; not discouraged; not forced to abandon purpose or effort
-undiminished in courage or valor; not giving way to fear
But the truth is, I was often dismayed by everything that had taken place, and I did battle discouragement. I battled fear and doubts. I hurt and was angry, and sometimes "undaunted" sounded more like a mockery than a mantra, and I was determined to be real about all of it in these posts, thus the name, Undaunted Reality. More than that, though, I was determined to live undaunted, not because I'm so great or strong, but because my God is, and no matter what this world looks like, He is the only reality that matters.
I pray I live the reality of Him beautifully undaunted.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

The Heart of the Matter

So we're moving, and right now I haven't the foggiest where we are moving to. People move to jobs, colleges, family, places they've always dreamed of. I don't have any of that, so what am I moving to?

The obvious answer is God, but unless I'm in rebellion, God is with me, so that isn't really that helpful. The next thought is: What does God want me to do when I get there? Reasonable question, so I asked Him.

All that keeps coming to mind are two questions:
If you could do anything, what would you do?
If you could have anything, what would you want?

Pretty pie in the sky questions, if you ask me, but then, I was reading in 2 Samuel last week because if a body wants to know how to seek God with no defined earthly parameters to limit you, David is the man to study. As I was reading, the following verse stuck in my mind:

He brought to fruition David's salvation--dealt with every foe and challenge David faced--and granted David's "every desire".

"If you could do anything, what would you do? If you could have anything, what would you want?"

What are your heart's desires?

This is what I'm moving toward.

So I took time to really think about that.

I know the typical answers of wanting this job or that house or the significant other or to just be happy. I want to be happy, too, but my idea of happy isn't necessary what others would want. So if I could do what makes me happy, if I could live and have what made me happy, what would that be? This is what I listed:

1. To have a great relationship with my kids
2. For my kids to seek God with all they are
3. For them to serve Him with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength
4. To enjoy the adventure
5. To write books that bring healing and restore identities
6. To live to my potential
7. For the kids to have "Jonathan" and "Ruth" friends
8. To trust God so fiercely and wholly that I never back down from a giant
9. To be a safe place for people
10. For my mouth to be a fount of wisdom
11. For my house to be "the place to go"

Those are the things that would really bring me joy. Those are my heart's desires. There may be more than didn't cross my mind at the moment, but this is my core.

So everyday now I read the verse from 2 Samuel 23:5 and I pray over this list and ask:

How do I lead my house so it is in order
and you can give me the desires of my heart?

I don't expect some magic wand that blesses just anything I do, but I want to live the kind of life that can be wildly blessed.

And that is what I'm moving toward.

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