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UNDAUNTED
For a few very hard years this word was my mantra.
The word means
-undismayed; not discouraged; not forced to abandon purpose or effort
-undiminished in courage or valor; not giving way to fear
But the truth is, I was often dismayed by everything that had taken place, and I did battle discouragement. I battled fear and doubts. I hurt and was angry, and sometimes "undaunted" sounded more like a mockery than a mantra, and I was determined to be real about all of it in these posts, thus the name, Undaunted Reality. More than that, though, I was determined to live undaunted, not because I'm so great or strong, but because my God is, and no matter what this world looks like, He is the only reality that matters.
I pray I live the reality of Him beautifully undaunted.

Thursday, September 22, 2016

Because Love is the Kind Place in a Hard Day

I won't go into the details of today because I promise you, someone reading this had a worse day. I will tell you it was hard...and hurtful...and I have spent a considerable amount of time simply praying to get through it, including time kneeling at the wooden altar in my room in silence because I have no words.

And what I will tell you about is the waitress at Chili's named Angie who brought me my order of bacon ranch chicken quesadillas with the nasty new uppity sour cream. When I asked about the regular sour cream, she explained that only came with their dinner portion but she could bring me some, only it would cost extra.  I told her no. I see no point in paying extra for plain sour cream when the supped up disgusting stuff is free. A few minutes later the manager walked to our table and handed me sour cream. Free of charge.

It was kind of a small deal. Except today, it was a really big deal.

And I will tell you about my kids' orthodontist. I was dreading today because WonderBoy got his rubber bands to prepare his teeth for braces next week, and this whole dental journey has been incredibly hard, and the anxiety attacks have been intense. While WonderBoy talked to the tech, the orthodontist pulled me into a private office to explain the tooth situation, what we are hoping happens, and  the possible treatments plans if necessary. He was so kind. He talked in a very calming tone. Kind of different for him. I've come to realize he cares deeply for his patients, but sometimes strong personalities carry themselves in ways that seem distant. Not today. Today he was compassionate and gentle. Today he was a gift.

And I will tell you about our dentist and his staff. WonderGirl had to go in for her usual teeth cleaning, and in the midst of this suffocating day, I sat in the waiting room watching the Disney Channel to one side, listening to the sound of WonderGirl singing to her hygienist from the other side, and I smiled. Then when as we prepared to leave, we chatted with the staff, like usual, and like usual, they gave me long hugs, and when our dentist came by, he stopped to talk to me for a few minutes and he hugged me, too.

It never ceases to amaze me how good a hug can feel or how much easier it is to breathe with the arms of people who care about you around you.

Humbly thankful.....

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